Recruiter: why do you want the job?
Candidate [nervous]: um, I think I can do the job, I have the right experience
Recruiter [mild irritation]: ok…sell me this pen
Candidate [nervous]: err it’s a black pen. With blue ink. It writes well
Recruiter [imposing]: ok, do you think you can cope with pressure?
Candidate [defensive]: well I wouldn’t have been in my current job this long unless I could
Recruiter [dismissive]: thank you, I’ll be in touch if the client wants to see you.
Humour aside, the above exchange is just a mild variation of the hundreds of other exchanges that do go on during the candidate or job interviews held either by a recruiter or hiring manager.
Though what is really going on underneath?
The answer is revealed by the green crocodile -
When we are protecting ourselves and our own interests or security whether that’s through the job title we have, the longevity in the market sector, the company/brand we work for, the level or seniority we are to another person, then we close rank, shut down and don’t allow anyone to enter. But when we don’t allow someone in and keep them out then they simply walk away with “the experience of us” that leaves a particular taste.
Whatever a person’s taste or experience is of us is important and important to reflect on. During exchanges of any kind including job interviews it’s worth considering – does a person walk away from our bite and snap or instead the warmth and openness of simple love?
The more we actively drop our varying degrees of protection, the more our truer quality gets unveiled, shown, tasted, heard and felt which leaves an experience of us that’s real and so often appreciated.
And when we learn to speak and express from the quality that’s underneath our crocodile of protection as the cartoon shows something transforming occurs between two people -
Alignment from trust
We come to realise that we’re far better off and can move more freely without the heavy cloaks of protective layers. And that to judge, critique, prod, interrogate, ruff up, cajole through questioning to prove a point or to make a person feel a certain way is a complete waste of energy and space because it puts a person off, resistance happens and defences go up.
There is no point and no real gain when someone turns away, there is every point and every win when they turn towards us because of us. The real us that we reflect gently works to reveal the real them - not their crocodile. The us that knows we’re both on a level and therefore on the same side, equal. And the us that deep down knows it’s only the real-us that makes for the best (candidate) experience that will always be remembered, even at times unforgettable.